Anyway, stupidly, I did the Mersyndol trick again, and ended up sleeping most of Saturday. Got up briefly in the afternoon to pick up my new dress for G's cousins wedding on the 1st of May. This was kindly paid for by G because I really dont want to go and because of the winnings. I mean how inconsiderate of them planning a wedding on May day? It means Im going miss my last ever chance to see the Beltane fire festival which Im really pissed off about.

We also got our tickets for day 2 of "T in the park", if I wasnt so tired I'd do a happy dance because Im going to see The Pixies, The Stokes, The Thrills, Franz Ferdinand & PJ Harvey! So excited!

Then I went home for another sleep before G picked me up to go and see 21 Grams, which is good, if not a little depressing.

Sunday we were at the folks all day in Glasgow. They are odd, in ways too numerous to mention. Anyway, G changed his mind about ruining Easter by telling his folks Im going home because his mum asked me if we are still thinking about a "Holiday" to Australia. Sometime ago G must have mentioned this. It was awkward, and so was my response, so I went for a walk while he told them. When I came back there was more awkward talk about "Seeing how we feel about each other". Really though, they coped like champions, because I could tell his mum was pretty upset.

Now that we've told them it makes it all the more real and Im having major doubts about whether I can go through with it.

Im just so tired, Im having trouble seeing the point of anything. The future, bah, who cares. I could just crawl into my bed and stay there forever and be done with it.

I want to go see G tonight but I cant because I have to wash clothes for work tomorrow, I had no chance for anything practical over the weekend. I suppose this is the feeling I should get used to.